SEXIST RACIST CLASSIST AGEIST HOMOPHOBIC IGNORAMUS
Parody of Brian Hyland's "Itsy Bitsy Teenie Weenie Yellow Polka Dot Bikini" (Vance/Pockriss)
Lyrics by M. Spaff Sumsion

PERFORMED BY ROBERT LUND
Kylee Johnson: Female Vocal
Robert Lund: Everything Else

From the CD Politicked Off!
Sample/Download from the Mad Music Archive
Featured on the Dr. Demento Show! Request it again!

I'm so ashamed that I called you a [censored]
It's a slur that I never should use
I would deny that I called you a [censored]
But the clip is all over the news

Two, three, four - What are people angry for?

'Cause I'm a
Sexist racist classist ageist homophobic ignoramus
Though I've stopped saying [censored] out loud
A sexist racist classist ageist homophobic ignoramus
If it slipped out, I must have been plowed

Four, three, two - Tell them you were sniffing glue

I am not prejudiced against [censored]s
There are [censored]s that live on my street
In fact, some of my best friends are [censored]s
They are almost like us, and that's sweet

Three, four, five - It's okay if they're alive

I'm not a
Sexist racist classist ageist homophobic ignoramus
I say be what you claim you must be
I'm not a racist classist ageist homophobic ignoramus
Just don't be it where I have to see

Two, three, four - Stay inside and close the door

I should go meet with the head of the [censored]s
I'll make the [censored] community see
I've got nothing but love for the [censored]s
No one puts up with [censored]s like me

Thirty, forty, fifty - You're so tolerant it's nifty

I'm not a
Sexist racist classist ageist homophobic ignoramus
Please forgive me; I spoke out of place
A sexist racist classist ageist homophobic ignoramus
Now you [censored]s, get out of my face!

Let your agent make a statement
Let the statement blame the gin
Let the gin send you to rehab
Now the healing can begin!

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