Spaff.com "Red State Woman" - parody of Gretchen Wilson's "Redneck Woman"

Image: Glen Stollberger

RED STATE WOMAN
Parody of Gretchen Wilson's "Redneck Woman"
Lyrics by M. Spaff Sumsion

Well I ain't never
Been the flippy-flop type
No, I'll support consistently
The stuff 't Bush says is right
Or my pastor
Or else my horoscope
It's intellek-chu-als I fear
I've decked out my pickup truck
With crosses, guns, and beer

I'm anti- stem cell research
But don't know what it means
I get opinions from talk ra-di-o
Not them biased magazines

'Cause I'm a red - state - woman
I ain't no left - wing - mom
I got no use for other countries
I say WHO WOULD JESUS BOMB?
So there's deficits and downturns and there ain't no jobs no more
At least no homo couple will be MOVING IN NEXT DOOR
So screw you all you lib'rals 'cause you'll never swing my state
Let me tell you who's in charge till at least Two Thousand Eight
My Bush!
(MY BUSH!)

That thing with al-Qaeda
Remember that?
Oh, I wonder why New York and D.C.
Voted Democrat?
And major cities (cities)
Target cities
Why the heck did y'all vote Blue?
Just think how George W.M.D.
Has made Earth safe for you

Keep your books and science
I don't let new thoughts in
But in my neck - of the woods
We call that Born Agin

Hey, I'm a red - state - woman
[etc.]

I'm a red - state - woman
I ain't no left - nut - job
When I think 'bout folks named Clinton
I say I DECLARE JIHAD
And I vote for moral values like intrusiveness and war
And damned if lesbo couples will be MOVING IN NEXT DOOR
So listen all you pinko commie godless gunless Blues
Let me tell you what you'll see on your lib'ral biii-assed news
(MY BUSH!)
MY BUSH!
(MY BUSH!)
My Bush!
(MY BUSH!)
GOD BLESS MY BUSH!