Opening Day is a state holiday
So me and Monroe we left the farm
We dressed up in camo, we loaded up our ammo
And a fifth of Jack to keep us warm
We'd only been in camp about an hour or so
When we had the most amazing luck
We had to keep ourselves from cheering 'cause right there in the clearing
Was a big ol' ten-point buck!

We fought for position like we do when we're fishin'
And we aimed our rifles over t'that spot
It was still kinda foggy, we were still kinda groggy
So we each took several shots
Well sure enough we hit him so we ran down to get him
When suddenly Monroe just froze
Oh no! he hollered - It's got a sleigh bell collar
And a bright red shiny nose!

I think Monroe shot Rudolph
But I'm pretty sure my shots missed
We never knew it was Rudy
So I hope Santa Claus ain't pissed
When he comes down the chimney this Christmas
He'll have no trouble seeing at all
It ain't dark at night 'cause there's a bright red light
From the reindeer head on our wall

When our trip was done we'd only seen that one
But that's one more than we usually get
Our lights were no good but with Rudy tied to the hood
The road was just like us - well lit!
But the story doesn't end 'cause just around the bend
Well, what did our eyes behold?
It's a sleigh! Right here! And there's eight more deer
Just a-standin' there in the road!
Lock and load!

I think Monroe shot Rudolph
But what a beautiful shot he had
We had no idear it was one of Santa's reindeer
And I hope Santy Claus ain't mad
When he stops by the farm this Christmas
On his way down to Albuquerque
We'll fix him up right with a case of Bud Light
And some venison jerky

I think Monroe shot Rudolph
Just a-sittin' in his tree stand
We had no idear it was one of Santa's reindeer
And I hope he'll understand
If he busts down the door this Christmas
And he presses us for a reason
We'll set the boy straight: Santa, Christmas is great
But 'round here we call it deer hunting season!

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