Image: Glen Stollberger


VATICAN CITY (MAKE ME POPE)
Parody of Guns N' Roses' "Paradise City"

PERFORMED BY MONEYSHOT COSMONAUTS
M. Spaff Sumsion: Concept and lyrics
Cari Golden: Vocals
Bob Emmet: All instruments and production

  • Play/Download from The Funny Music Project
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    Take me down to the Vatican City
    Where the nuns get none and the priests get pretty
    Make (oh won't you) me (please make me) pope

    Take me down to the Square of Saint Peter
    Where the square ain't square and the cards ain't either
    Make (oh won't you) me (please make me) pope

    Just you listen if a pope's whatcha seek:
    I walk past church five days a week!
    I can really relate with every sinner and freak
    So pass the sacramental wine!
    Listen dudes the throne should be mine!

    I'm your pontiff with pax appeal
    I got some buff bishops and some nuns of steel
    I got some parish'ners pimpin' out the popemobile
    If you think I drive around too fast
    Y'all can kneel and kiss my
    Ring!

    Take me down to the Vatican City
    Where the great big hats make the pilgrims giddy
    Oh won't you please make me pope

    Take me down where my scepter and cape'll
    Make me look less gay and a lot more papal
    Make me pope!

    After confession and a paternoster
    We'll ride my holy roller cosster
    We'll praise Saint Pauli on a Saint Martin beach
    And we'll surf the Apostolic See
    With Archangelina Jolie!

    Take me down to the Vatican City
    Where you can't have sex, though I don't alriddy
    Make me pope!

    Take me down to where my mystic crap'll
    Let me cut the line to the Sistine Chapel
    Oh won't you please make me pope

    White smoke will blow
    To start my show
    I'm Pope John Paul
    George Ringo!

    Hey, pull your mitered head out of your past - the
    College of Cardinals needs an English class - 'cause
    That Latin stuff is just a pain in the mass!
    And put this slum where we dwell
    Up for sale!
    Let's get a place in Cozumel!

    Take me down to the Vatican City
    It's a whole country but it's itty bitty
    Make me pope!

    Take me down where my sins'll get pardoned
    And the Swish Guards swish when they're through Swish Guardin'
    Oh won't you please make me pope

    St Peter's Square
    Hail Me in there!
    Oh won't you please make me pope

    I wanna be
    Pope John Paul Three
    Oh won't you please make me pope

    Take me down to the Vatican City
    Where the nuns get none and the priests get pretty
    Make (oh won't you) me (please make me) pope

    The Holy See
    -L-O-S-E-T
    Oh won't you please make me pope

    Ciao, baby!

    © 2005, 2013+ Spaff, LLC