BJ:
I do not like you, Starr-I-are.
I do believe you've gone too far.

DINC:
Would you, could you, Mr. Prez,
Confirm what Ms. Lewinsky says?
She spoke of your affairs illicit.
She said that when she'd come and visit...

NETWORK:
Let's go to break. That's too explicit.

DINC:
In your Jones case deposition,
You lied about your sex position.

BJ:
I do not like that Paula Jones.
I did not, could not, jump her bones.
Because she turned me in, the jerk,
I will not do her lawyers' work.
I will not, shall not, give her cash.
I will not help that trailer trash.

DINC:
You swore - do you remember what? -
"To tell the truth and nothing but."

BJ:
I said that? Hmm. I don't recall.
I don't remember that at all.
But truth's an open proposition
Depending on your definition,
So, sure, "the truth" is what I spoke.
Damn, that's tasty Diet Coke.

DINC:
Back to Monica - I quote -
She'd "blow your mind" and "rock your boat"?

BJ:
It's hard to say. It's hard to know.
I don't recall the blow-by-blow.

DINC:
Mr. Jordan and Ms. Currie
Say your memory's not that blurry.

BJ:
Look, I want to make this clear,
So I've prepared this statement here:
"I DID A THING THAT I REGRET."

DINC:
So that is all we're going to get?
You've called it "sin," you've called it "wrong" -
Just call it "sex," and let's move on!

BJ:
I will not parse what I just said,
Please get that through your pointy head.
I don't remember back that far.
So how ya like THEM apples, Starr?

DINC:
What juicy crime, what sin amorphous
Is hidden in that Oval Orifice?

BJ:
"Is?" "Is?" "Is?" "Is?"
Please, tell me what this "is" implizz.

DINC:
Had we but world enough and time,
This coyness, Clinton, were no crime.

KENDALL:
Mr. Wisenberg, excuse me. I have not objected heretofore to any question you've asked. But I must tell you, this is becoming less and less like Green Eggs and Ham. It's clear now that you desire only to embarrass the President, since you have chosen to improperly introduce lines from this unrelated poem.

BJ:
What poem?

KENDALL:
"To His Coy Mistress."

DINC:
I'll be happy to rephrase:

Would you, could you, kiss her chest?
Could you, would you, touch her breast?
Would you, could you, make a mess?
Could you, would you, on her dress?

BJ:
I will not say. That goes too far.
I will not answer, Starr-I-Are.
I will not fall for lawyers' tricks.
'Zit true McGwire hit 66?

DINC:
Don't change the subject. One suggestion -
Answer straight this simple question:
Did you touch her genitalia?

BJ:
I've told ya all I'm gonna tell ya.
I've more important things to do
Than think of things you ask me to.
All you people want is dirt,
So, to my statement, I'll revert.

DINC:
Did you touch her inner thigh?
Did she grab your little guy?
Did you get inside her shirt?

BJ:
Revert, revert, revert, revert.

DINC:
Did you do it in your chair?
Did you do it anywhere?
Did you do it in the hall?
Did you do it on the wall?
Did you do it on the phone?
Did you make Lewinsky moan?
Did you do it on the floor?
Was she Bubba's humidor?

BJ:
Time's up! Too late! I'd like to stay,
But I must lead the USA.
Besides, in just a couple hours
I've got a date with Genni Flowers.